What are you waiting for? Okay, here’s your invitation…
Ladies, time to take life and lifestyle an inventory. Are you living the life you want to live? How about the life you deserve? If you had any hesitation in answering either question, you have work to do and it starts with learning to love the skin you’re in.
First, recognize that it’s never too late to start living, nor is it ever too late to redefine yourself and pursue dreams (old or new). 40’s truly are the new 20s and “strong” the NEW Sexy. Get onboard! No more apologizing for wanting or doing it all. You can be “every” woman you are purposed to be whether you’re a homemaker, entrepreneur, business woman, politician, academician, athlete, doctor, or all the above. Whatever your heart’s desire, make it happen. If you don’t know how ASK! Don’t allow yourself to risk an unfulfilled existence because of life circumstances, pride, fear, and/or conditioning. And for heaven’s sake, do not listen to anyone who tells you “you can’t” or “you’re past your time”. If you are still drawing breath and not on your death bed, YOU CAN. Tune into your channel and block out the white-noise of social expectations and limitations. Once you change your mindset, you will find your willpower and thereby your strength to accomplish what you want to accomplish.
While, we, women are innately masters at juggling, juggling eventually becomes tiring. Learn how to manage your reality and you become the perfect performing artist. Forget to try to “balance”. Juggling is not balancing and the act of balancing is an elusive endeavor. In all honesty, there is no such thing as balance in a dynamic human life, only shifts in time, energy, focus and scope of priority. The term itself gives a misleading impression of reality. Change your perception and seek the right proportions that will allow you to manage and steady yourself in the ring of life.
Managing your reality requires a decisive choice, honesty, and clarity to oneself. Once you arrive at these, consciously work to understand and develop time, energy, focus, and scope of priority in relation to the following:
Don’t let life or others into your head to cause you to doubt yourself, capabilities, or purpose. Keep your emotions leveled out to maintain a clear head. The power to do so come from the mind and how you use it determines your success. Mindset should have the highest place in your scope of priorities. The lower they are, the higher your chance at failing to conquer life.
Educate yourself and develop your knowledge and know-how whether through formal education, vocational training, or self-study. Education and diverse experiences will free you and keep you free from conditioned thinking and other control mechanisms.
Pay every attention to what is going on inside your mind and your heart. When either or both are unhealthy, you are unhealthy and in potential trouble for making bad decisions concerning relationships—familial, platonic, or otherwise. Fulfill your responsibilities to them, but set and keep healthy boundaries and not impenetrable walls.
Have a high-performance standard and work ethic for yourself, but understand the norm is mediocrity and your efforts may not be appreciated. Bending over backward in hopes of eliciting a desired response is unproductive and futile. Simply do your job and the right people will notice. While we cannot control what happens to us, we can control how we react to circumstances and the choices we make.
5. Extracurricular Activities
Ladies, you should have a life outside of work and family. Don’t forget yourself in the mix. It will keep you from resentment and the “what-ifs”. Focus your time and energy on extracurricular which address, protect, and challenge your mental, physical, and spiritual health. They are your outlets, reserve, and fuel to your holistic strength.
Be accountable for your own happiness. Be honest with yourself and assess the areas of your life that present themselves opponents in this area. Learn to say “no”.
There is nothing wrong with “drive” in a woman. Drive has no gender or patent. Drive will grow your confidence and help you step into your power to claim what’s yours. It will give you the ability to keep moving forward.
8. Reflect and Examine
Learn from and study your experiences and those of others. Take time to reflect and examine. Ensure that you are not speaking, self-fulfilling negativity or sabotaging your mindset. Reflection and examination will help you manage anxieties, doubts, and fears.
Life is worth living and discovering the answers. Rediscover yourself or get to know yourself for the first time. Make up your mind to be happy and be happy. What’s left today will be there tomorrow. See the big picture in detail and keep your eye on the prize. Be flexible and do not worry.
10. Empower and Connect
Connect with others and be resourceful. Don’t be afraid to ask for or take advice, but realize what works for one may not work for another; find the right mix for you. Wisdom begets wisdom and empowers.
Managing your reality means that you have handled the various elements in your life, and your mind and heart are not being pulled disproportionately in one direction or the other. Realize that expectation and the goal of perfection is unattainable; an extreme in anything can be detrimental. When you learn to manage your reality, you will be able to gain and keep your peace and perspective midst performing. Remind yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing. If you cannot come up with a rationale or justification for why you’re doing something, perhaps that is a clue you shouldn’t be doing it. Figure out what you should be doing.
Figuring out what you should be doing and/or recovering lost dreams is not an easy task. If they were, you wouldn’t need this pep talk or guidance. Don’t talk yourself out of it and don’t let fear paralyze you. You are a “wonder” woman, so believe it. It’s your life and it’s your prerogative. Shine unapologetically!